Money makes the world go round so I thought! I grew up on completely two different sides of financial status' so when I say that I'm a "calokie" (crossbreed between Oklahoma and California), you will learn to understand how I really did have two very different lives. My parents were divorced when I was 4 years old and my mom moved us to California. A young, single mom of two that worked hard to provide for us. We were the first ones at daycare and the last ones picked up. My grandma helped out some, but really my mom did it all herself. We lived in an apartment in a not so favorable part of town but we made it. I remember going to canned food outlet for our groceries and the laundry mat on Saturday's to do our wash. We didn't go out alot or do much but our needs were provided for and we were content. I remember how excited my mom would get when she got that golden envelope in the mail once a year and we would do some shopping :) My Oklahoma family (dads side) had been in real estate many years and my grandparents had gotten to a point where they were able to spend more on the finer and funner things in life. My dad was always gone at work, on a trip or working in houses which I didn't understand at the time, but we spent alot of time with grandma and grandpa where we (my brother and I) were a bit spoiled (understatement). As I became a teenager my mom got remarried and had stepkids. We became a family of seven in a four bedroom house where I shared a room and worked for my own wants, but in Oklahoma....I had the whole second floor so I bounced back and forth with lifestyles.
When I moved out on my own in both states, my tastes changed as many of you understand as I was responsible for myself. My first husband was diagnosed with cancer when I was 17 so with him being sick and at 19 being a mother money was tight. Divorced at 21 and a mother, things were tighter and I learned to appreciate the smaller things in life but those were some of the best times of my life. At the time I met my second husband I was buying groceries with three different credit cards each visit. We bought a restaurant and started obtaining rental property very fast. Like 25 at a time and remodeling them, renting them and buying more in bulk. The problem is we got too much too fast as well as having another baby that we began to borrow our lives away and basically robbing Peter to pay Paul over and over and over again. The thoughts were if we could just make more money we would be fine and happy so that's what we did. I began to sell real estate and the money rolled in, well so did our taste and we began living a lifestyle we borrowed. The stress of that lifestyle and the people in it along with piles of bills and IOUs was enough to break us in all aspects. Everyone thought we were made of money and I have always had a giving heart so I began helping every person in need whether I had the money or not. I became dependent on renters to pay bills and it's a desperate position to be in because they will screw you up everytime! I learned real quick that real estate goes up and down and when you blow your money like it's never going out then you hit a down cycle then your family is having ramen noodles repeatedly and teachers are calling you for money not turned in for a school event. I thought I had to have the best of everything and give it all to my kids that I didn't have and yet they never even appreciated it because they had never gone without or had it any other way....until I was divorced again and a single mom of three. Talk about budget cuts, oh my! No cable for starters, rent house with no yard, no school lunches, nothing new, no Christmas (from me, I have other family).....let's just say we went under a 100 percent money makeover and I got a salary job paying less but a stable income to build my budget. It was weekly trips to dollar general for supplies and food. We visited the free park....ALOT! But once again, it was one of the happiest times in my life. I have gotten us out of debt 3 times before as a family only for us to run up every account within the year. This time is forever....I dont want to live that way anymore. I started going to church and tithing. I had to almost cancel two missions trips because I had no money, but continued to live frugally. I was determined to pay off every penny I owe to anyone. I cleaned off all medical bills one at a time, I began to pay down credit cards and lines. I started budgeting to pay back taxes that I ignored in previous years. Alot of work that year in restructuring not only who I was but where I was going.
I had money due for a missions trip so I sold all my jewelry and anything else I could get money for and took it to church the night it was due only to find out I owed nothing. Someone paid my way for me to go. It was the first time I had cried probably in years literally. Nobody had ever done anything like that for me and I knew maybe 5 people at the church. Nobody knew my story, absolutely amazing. I went on the trip, changed my life and came back only for God to challenge me in my tithes. I already faithfully tithed 10 percent of my salary and real estate money...he upped it to 20 percent. Yea right, I'm a single mom of three kids making money under poverty level and I'm supposed to tithe 20 percent for a year (god lost his marbles, but I did it). I finished the year with $10,000 in the bank my next two missions trips paid in full, bills paid, taxes paid and credit being paid off PRAISE GOD!!! For the first time EVER, my bills were paid early and I had extra to help others. I was happy when the year was up to report I closed out the highest income ever last year! I was glad when Jan 1 rolled around because my challenge was over and I could have 10 percent back, but I was wrong. I was asked to do it again and I have FAITHFULLY! I haven't sold as many homes this year but I have paid off over $100k in debt and changed the financial course of my family while trusting God with the rest. It's really hard to not get to go or do what we want by just swiping a card. It's painful to not have the pretty cruising boat to play in the lake but I sleep at night and I don't have to juggle accounts to keep afloat. Yes, I have financial trouble....there are days I can't buy gas or food BUT I know when I'm being tempted to fall in the trap just use your card and pay it when it comes in. Yea right, it's taken me three times of failure to get where I'm at now. I dream of being on vacation but only because I can sleep not owing people or staying up trying to figure out who gets cut from paying this month. God can restore ANY need or brokeness if you let go, trust him and listen. You will be tempted, you will go through hard times, but don't give up before God steps in. His timing is perfect, ALWAYS!
When I moved out on my own in both states, my tastes changed as many of you understand as I was responsible for myself. My first husband was diagnosed with cancer when I was 17 so with him being sick and at 19 being a mother money was tight. Divorced at 21 and a mother, things were tighter and I learned to appreciate the smaller things in life but those were some of the best times of my life. At the time I met my second husband I was buying groceries with three different credit cards each visit. We bought a restaurant and started obtaining rental property very fast. Like 25 at a time and remodeling them, renting them and buying more in bulk. The problem is we got too much too fast as well as having another baby that we began to borrow our lives away and basically robbing Peter to pay Paul over and over and over again. The thoughts were if we could just make more money we would be fine and happy so that's what we did. I began to sell real estate and the money rolled in, well so did our taste and we began living a lifestyle we borrowed. The stress of that lifestyle and the people in it along with piles of bills and IOUs was enough to break us in all aspects. Everyone thought we were made of money and I have always had a giving heart so I began helping every person in need whether I had the money or not. I became dependent on renters to pay bills and it's a desperate position to be in because they will screw you up everytime! I learned real quick that real estate goes up and down and when you blow your money like it's never going out then you hit a down cycle then your family is having ramen noodles repeatedly and teachers are calling you for money not turned in for a school event. I thought I had to have the best of everything and give it all to my kids that I didn't have and yet they never even appreciated it because they had never gone without or had it any other way....until I was divorced again and a single mom of three. Talk about budget cuts, oh my! No cable for starters, rent house with no yard, no school lunches, nothing new, no Christmas (from me, I have other family).....let's just say we went under a 100 percent money makeover and I got a salary job paying less but a stable income to build my budget. It was weekly trips to dollar general for supplies and food. We visited the free park....ALOT! But once again, it was one of the happiest times in my life. I have gotten us out of debt 3 times before as a family only for us to run up every account within the year. This time is forever....I dont want to live that way anymore. I started going to church and tithing. I had to almost cancel two missions trips because I had no money, but continued to live frugally. I was determined to pay off every penny I owe to anyone. I cleaned off all medical bills one at a time, I began to pay down credit cards and lines. I started budgeting to pay back taxes that I ignored in previous years. Alot of work that year in restructuring not only who I was but where I was going.
I had money due for a missions trip so I sold all my jewelry and anything else I could get money for and took it to church the night it was due only to find out I owed nothing. Someone paid my way for me to go. It was the first time I had cried probably in years literally. Nobody had ever done anything like that for me and I knew maybe 5 people at the church. Nobody knew my story, absolutely amazing. I went on the trip, changed my life and came back only for God to challenge me in my tithes. I already faithfully tithed 10 percent of my salary and real estate money...he upped it to 20 percent. Yea right, I'm a single mom of three kids making money under poverty level and I'm supposed to tithe 20 percent for a year (god lost his marbles, but I did it). I finished the year with $10,000 in the bank my next two missions trips paid in full, bills paid, taxes paid and credit being paid off PRAISE GOD!!! For the first time EVER, my bills were paid early and I had extra to help others. I was happy when the year was up to report I closed out the highest income ever last year! I was glad when Jan 1 rolled around because my challenge was over and I could have 10 percent back, but I was wrong. I was asked to do it again and I have FAITHFULLY! I haven't sold as many homes this year but I have paid off over $100k in debt and changed the financial course of my family while trusting God with the rest. It's really hard to not get to go or do what we want by just swiping a card. It's painful to not have the pretty cruising boat to play in the lake but I sleep at night and I don't have to juggle accounts to keep afloat. Yes, I have financial trouble....there are days I can't buy gas or food BUT I know when I'm being tempted to fall in the trap just use your card and pay it when it comes in. Yea right, it's taken me three times of failure to get where I'm at now. I dream of being on vacation but only because I can sleep not owing people or staying up trying to figure out who gets cut from paying this month. God can restore ANY need or brokeness if you let go, trust him and listen. You will be tempted, you will go through hard times, but don't give up before God steps in. His timing is perfect, ALWAYS!
It's amazing how easy it is to "Live the American dream". We were doing that well until my husband lost his job making 20$+ an hr. I was working at a machine shop and putting in 80hrs a week plus picked up a waitressing job working as close to 40hrs I could. I slept 2hrs a night. We did this for 9 months while he looked for work. Shortly after he found a job, I got pregnant (def a miricle from God) and he freaked out to say the least. We worked hard and paid off almost 70,000$ in 18 months. We became debt free doing the Dave Ramsey plan. I've been able to stay home for the past 16 months with our son. God works everything out.....
ReplyDeleteIts easy to get caught up in what we think will make us happy and successful, but it turned into the "American nightmere" for us rather than the American dream. We tried Dave Ramsey but without a steady paycheck we couldnt budget. Once we got steady paychecks, I use some of those principals. I LOVE listening to his show!!!
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