Fasting day 5 of 21

Im really proud of myself for not being tempted. I feel pretty tired and have had several headaches, but Im still moving forward. One of my main prayers for this fast was to take a step back from my fast paced busy life and just stop. I want to be in tune with God as I have been previously. I know the bible talks about fasting in a quiet place and not to make it a spectacle that the Daniel fast has become, but I really want to share my journey and this is apart of it. Prayer and meditation with God, spending quality time with God is sooooooo important to your walk. He wants nothing more than a relationship with us and we cant be in a relationship if we dont listen to each other and talk to each other. He does know everything we are going to tell him before we do, and yet he still wants to hear it from us. Its amazing to me as I have journeyed through the bible of how big and mighty our God is and yet how gentle and soft he is. He cries when we cry and lately that has been alot for me so I know hes been busy, but all joking aside he really is the man for me. I want to restore my peace and joy that I had a year ago. I need clarity and I need financial breakthrough. I know this fast will be an amazing story to share just as the last one was. I had some friends over last night and they introduced me to a new book "The 4:8 Principle" by Tommy Newberry and its based of the verse Phillipians 4:8. It talks about your thoughts and teaches you to take ownership in your thoughts thus restoring your joy by the thoughts you have and the attitudes you choose. Im not very far into the book, but this sentence stuck out to me, "Think the thoughts you would think if you trusted Gods promises completely". Reading that made me think of where I was at when I had the joy that Im seeking back now and the truth is, times were harder and I clung on to God more and relied on his promises more when I had less than I do now. Thats BIG for me, and not that I wasnt aware it happens, I just didnt realize the place I was in now and so all the questions of why are put in perspective because I let go of those promises and just started living life. Its like learning to ride a bike without training wheels the first time. Someone is behind you holding you and when you think your ready you tell them to let go and most likely you fall. I dont want God to let go of me, but when I stop holding on to his promises then Im telling him "I got this" and then I fall and wonder why. "The secret conversations you hold in privacy of your own mind are shaping your destiny, little by little". If you let your mind go the way it is now how does that destiny look for you? If your not liking the way its headed its time to turn the wheel. The meaning of the statement above is this "With every thought that races through your mind, you are continually reinventing yourself and your future" and you hold the key to how it will turn out. I get in the most difficult spiritual warfares in my mind because of my thoughts and I need to speak Gods word over those "Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what Gods will is-his good, pleasing and perfect will" Romans 12:2